Stepping In Faith

The Importance Of Intimacy

• Stepping In Faith • Season 1 • Episode 19

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What if intimacy was never meant to start with your body, but with your spirit? In this transformative episode, we dive deep into the true nature of intimacy beyond physical connection, exploring how authentic relationships begin with vulnerability before God first.

When Adam and Eve stood "naked and unashamed," they modeled perfect intimacy – not just physical nakedness, but complete spiritual transparency. This blueprint for divine connection shows us that before they could be vulnerable with each other, they were each intimate with God individually, creating a beautiful trinity of connection that modern relationships often miss.

Many of us struggle with intimacy because past wounds from parents, previous relationships, or personal trauma have created barriers to trust. These soul wounds cause us to "bleed" on others, projecting our past hurts onto current relationships. Meanwhile, cultural messages bombard us with counterfeit versions of intimacy focused on physical gratification rather than spiritual alignment.

The enemy's version of intimacy is flesh-first rather than spirit-first, transactional rather than covenantal, and creates soul ties without spiritual alignment. In contrast, God's design begins within, drawing people together because of what lies beneath the layer of skin. This is why two Christians coming together doesn't automatically create a "God-ordained" relationship – true divine connection happens when each person is first intimate with God, surrendering everything to Him.

Whether you're single, dating, or married, this episode will challenge you to examine the foundation of your relationships and discover how vulnerability—withholding nothing—creates the pathway to experience intimacy as God intended. Share your thoughts or experiences in the comments, and subscribe to journey with us as we continue exploring faith-centered relationships.

Ready to dive deeper? 🎧 Join us on YouTube for the full video podcast where we explore faith, love, and relationships through a Christian lens. Whether married, single, or seeking spiritual growth, our episodes offer practical advice and profound insights to strengthen your walk with Jesus. Don’t forget to subscribe and hit the notification bell so you never miss a powerful episode. Let’s grow together in faith and purpose!
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Walter:

Welcome back to another episode of Stepping in Faith, where, together, we explore the importance of having a relationship with God and how that relationship with God can impact the relationship you have with others. I'm your host, walter. I'm joined here alongside my lovely wife. Shanea. This is episode 19. Who prayed last week? Me or you?

Shanea:

I was trying to figure it out. I don't know, I think.

Walter:

I think you prayed.

Shanea:

I think I prayed.

Walter:

I think you prayed, so it's my turn to pray. I think so. So we say this every episode. We're believers. We like to start these episodes out in prayer, so we will do the same with this episode, all right, father God, as we come before you this afternoon, we are so grateful for your love, your mercy and your grace. We're grateful for your care, your kindness, your joy, your peace, and we pray that your perfect will will continue to be carried out.

Walter:

We welcome you in here. We welcome your presence. Allow your presence to flow throughout this home. Allow your fire, your purifying fire, to flow even as we record this episode. Let it touch the hearts, god, of those that you've called for it to touch. Lord Jesus, we welcome you, we acknowledge you, we submit to you, we surrender to you. Holy Spirit, we pray that you will lead and guide our tone. Speak to us, allow us to speak what the Father would have us say. Take full control of this episode. Let it change the lives of those it has been called to change. Let it reach those it's been called to reach. It's in Jesus' name we pray, amen. Amen.

Walter:

Why you say amen like that.

Shanea:

I don't know.

Walter:

Were you trying to say I was praying alone?

Shanea:

No.

Walter:

You said amen.

Shanea:

No, I didn't mean it like that. I don't know why I said it like that. I just did Okay, Like amen I don't know, I just did like amen.

Walter:

I don't know so what's this week's episode? Title?

Shanea:

the importance of intimacy the importance of intimacy.

Walter:

I like the way the light looks on you you like the way the light looks on you. You like the way I look To. God be the glory. So I was actually I think I was editing last week episode and that stood out Like we said something about intimacy and it just it highlighted. It was like, okay, that's what you want me to speak about, that's what you want us to touch on. Next is intimacy, the importance of intimacy, and it just kind of went from there and yeah, I got the same thing.

Walter:

Yeah, and we got into it and it just began to kind of flow. And last week we was discussing sex, right?

Shanea:

Yeah, sex outside of God's design. I think that was the last episode.

Walter:

Yeah, I believe so. So it just kind of flows. A lot of times with the episodes we just pray or we just ask God what it is that he wants us to discuss. That's the thing about this podcast. We don't really discuss necessarily what we want to. We discuss what God tells us to discuss, because it's not our podcast.

Shanea:

No, and it's crazy because every episode, kind of like, flows into the next episode.

Walter:

It's not something that we're trying to do.

Walter:

It's just what do you want us to discuss? Next guy and he gives us that and we're like all right, cool. I and he gives us that and we're like all right, cool, we're 19 episodes in and I remember when we started this I'm like, okay, how are we going to continue to come up with, you know, discussion points, especially if we're not creating them ourselves? This is a trust factor of trusting God. So, intimacy as we get started. I'm keeping an eye on time it's 144, so we're going to try to be done by 244. Uh, let's see, make sure my phone is silent, make sure your phone is silent, babe, so there's no interruptions. So one of the things that came to mind as I was thinking about this was lust can negatively impact our level of intimacy in our relationships.

Shanea:

Yes.

Walter:

That lightning hit just now.

Shanea:

Oh, it did.

Walter:

Yeah, it did. It is a thunderstorm now as well, but we're going to pray that it kind of keeps calm until we finish recording. But yeah, lust can negatively impact our level and then the thunder rolls, but they probably can't hear.

Shanea:

I don't know, I don't know.

Walter:

If you can, it's just what it is.

Shanea:

It is what it is. It's thunder and lightning outside.

Walter:

So it wasn't supposed to start to like two or three three o'clock, but lust can negatively impact our level of intimacy in our relationships.

Shanea:

That's when the first thing that came to mind absolutely which is so true yeah, because um like after the last episode I was thinking about how, when we met, um like how, lust wasn't there, and I didn't understand why there was an attraction to you, but it wasn't an attraction that I was used to, because it wasn't lust, and so I was confused.

Walter:

Yeah, same, it made no sense. It was something that was deeper within. That kind of drew me. I didn't understand it because it was something I never experienced and no one could explain it either. It was like, oh, you just really care about her and I'm like, no, that's not it. But yeah, as we dig into this, we'll be digging into all of that. But key scriptures that we're going to be discussing this afternoon tongue-tied Romans, 12 and 1, 1 Samuel, 16, or chapter 16, verse 7, genesis, 2, 25, chapter 2, verse 25,. 1 Corinthians, chapter 6, verse 17,. Romans, chapter 1, verse 24 through 27,. John, chapter 10, verse 10. Proverbs, chapter 5 through chapter 7. First Corinthians, chapter 6, verse 15 through 20. Those are our key scriptures today. Okay, so, babe, do you want to go ahead and look in or read what the general definition of intimacy is? And this is based off of the Webster Dictionary.

Shanea:

Okay, so the definition of intimacy is the state of being intimate, or close familiarity and friendship.

Walter:

I didn't like that definition.

Shanea:

Why you didn't like it.

Walter:

It's superficial, it doesn't dig into the depth of what intimacy is.

Shanea:

No, because it uses the word intimate which is crazy.

Walter:

Webster don't even know what intimacy is no so I was.

Walter:

I looked at Webster and I wanted to type in also um, to see what intimacy was. I'm like, okay, god, what is, what is your definition of intimacy? As I was coming up with these notes, as we was going through that process, and what he dropped in my spirit was the act of revealing all. It's, an act of opening yourself to someone, withholding nothing. And so the song came to mind with william mcdowelling Nothing, which I started to listen to. I wrote here that that's what came to mind, and what God dropped in my spirit at that moment in time is, as I begin to listen to, withholding Nothing, because sometimes we talked about this before God, he can speak through different ways.

Walter:

He gives you songs.

Speaker 2:

He gives us songs, different things. You go and you listen to the song. Yeah.

Walter:

And then more revelation to begin to flow. So everyone listening to this podcast, please go listen to William McDowell Withholding Nothing.

Shanea:

I'll post it at the end of the video, yeah.

Walter:

It's a powerful song, and so what was dropped in my spirit was in order to experience intimacy with your spouse, you have to first experience intimacy with God, and so the song with William McDowell, it really, it is what it's saying. William McDowell was singing and saying I'll give you every part of me.

Shanea:

I'll give you all of me.

Walter:

I'll give you all of me. Withholding nothing, Withholding nothing. I give you all of me.

Shanea:

I give you all of me Withholding nothing Withholding nothing, and that's what I got. Also, when I asked God what intimacy was, and he was, just what came to me was Adam and Eve just being super vulnerable, you know, naked and ashamed.

Walter:

Unashamed, unashamed.

Shanea:

Naked and unashamed.

Walter:

Excuse me, it really is what it is. Yet the bible says that they became one and the two became.

Walter:

The two was naked and unashamed before god. But one of the things that god was dealing with me on earlier on, like in 2023, was that, in order for them to have been naked and unashamed together, it started with adam being naked and unashamed by himself, and Eve was created from Adam, so that means that she also was naked and unashamed before God. So when you think of intimacy, you think of being in the space where you both are vulnerable to the things of God. Like you don't hold. It goes back to that William McDowell song you withhold nothing from God.

Walter:

I surrender all, you give all of you over to him, and so when you think of it, right?

Walter:

to expand on intimacy. Intimacy is the closeness and connection shared between people, typically characterized by deep emotional, physical, intellectual or spiritual bonds. It involves vulnerability, trust and openness, allowing individuals to feel seen, understood and accepted by one another. So there's different levels. There's actually five different levels of intimacy. There's emotional intimacy, which is the sharing of feelings, thoughts and experience on a deep level intimacy, which is the sharing of feelings, thoughts and experience on a deep level. There's physical intimacy, which includes affection, touch and sexual closeness. There's intellectual intimacy, which is connecting through shared ideas, conversations and interests. There's spiritual intimacy, which is sharing beliefs, values or practices related to meaning and purpose. And then there's experiential intimacy, which is bonding through shared activities or experiences. Many of us, especially in marriages, relationships, we only focus heavily on that physical intimacy.

Walter:

We may dig into experiential intimacy, possibly physical intimacy. Right, we may dig into like experiential intimacy, possibly intellectual intimacy.

Shanea:

But the physical intimacy, like it, blinds you from all the other aspects of intimacy.

Walter:

Yes, because it's something you can see.

Shanea:

It's something you can feel.

Walter:

Yeah, exactly. So moving into intimacy with God first right. Mm-hmm. You want to go ahead and go to Romans 12 and one, and it's when we're reading everyone. We're always going through the NLT version. When I started my journey back in the day, I did a new King Jane version. I even did a new international version, but when I started my journey off in 2022, I started off with NLT. Yeah.

Shanea:

Some verses sound better. Are they hit different?

Walter:

than New King James. You deal with different translations. You'll deal with New King James. You'll deal with NLT.

Shanea:

You'll get different revelations from different versions.

Walter:

Yeah.

Shanea:

But Romans 12, 1 says and so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice, the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him.

Walter:

I believe I have it somewhere in here, but one of the things that god has dropped in my spirit as I was reading romans 12 and 1 is by giving all you have to god, or, a matter of fact, and we talked about this intimacy is an act of worship yeah intimacy with god is an act of worship.

Shanea:

Yeah, because you're surrendering everything, You're giving your body to him as a holy sacrifice which you owe to him.

Walter:

So when we're practicing in intimacy, it's literally us practicing in worship to the Father, and so I think that's so important and it really touches on it so heavily. And then, even as we dig into that right, because it starts there- as you learn to be intimate with God. When you get into a point of having that relationship with whoever God has called you to be with, it's easier for you to be intimate with that person.

Walter:

Now both parties have to be at the space of knowing you know having a relationship with God, being intimate with God, because it can become dangerous if you get with someone where you have an intimate relationship with God yet they're not intimate with God, Because this digs into the fact of having you be in a space where you are. One of the things that God dealt with me on earlier on is not to trust you, but to trust the God in you.

Shanea:

The Holy Spirit.

Walter:

Exactly so. If you don't have the Holy Spirit leading you, I can get caught up yeah. And a lot of people get hurt by that, because they're trying to trust someone but they don't have god in them, and it's only god that they keep you grounded. It's only god that they keep me grounded.

Shanea:

I'm not gonna get off to a subject, though no, it's because you're following someone who isn't following or isn't being led by the holy spirit. So it's like where is this person leading you? Yeah or how are they affecting you?

Walter:

Because we're going to dig into it later on. But sin produces shame. Sin leads you, and so you're following someone or you're in a relationship with someone that is ashamed, so they hide things, so it negatively impacts the level of intimacy within your relationship.

Shanea:

Right, because you're not being vulnerable or open.

Walter:

Exactly Genesis 2 and 25. Let's see, and this says, and we know this. It says now, the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame. And so Genesis 2 and 25, it touches on the importance of both man and woman being naked before god and being unashamed. So this is something that god gave you a revelation on right where that that there is a relationship between the three. Yeah, you want to read that.

Shanea:

I think I got a revelation later on, I think.

Walter:

You got something different.

Shanea:

No, it's the same, but I think I'll touch on it.

Walter:

You want to touch on it later?

Shanea:

being naked and unashamed and how this means that the relationship between the three of them right or the two of them where they were both fully exposed to God, first by themselves with God, and then to each other with God.

Walter:

So it creates almost like a triune.

Shanea:

Because they each had their own. They each had their own. They were each joined with God first in spirit, before they came to each other. So it was like a like a magnet, like attraction, right. So the Holy Spirit was attracted to the Holy Spirit within this person and they just kind of came together.

Walter:

Let me help you out real quick.

Shanea:

No, I have it down. It's just further down. I believe it's in.

Walter:

Because it was put together so well. But we're touching that.

Shanea:

It's in God-ordained relationships. I think it's in part five.

Walter:

Okay, so we'll keep going. So trust and exposure right, and this is so important and we was just talking about this. Intimacy requires exposure of everything which comes from a place of trust and total reliance on God. You have to be okay with God seeing everything, and that's what we were talking about before. God has to see it all, as well as your spouse you have to be okay with God seeing everything, and that's what we were talking about before.

Walter:

God has to see it all as well as your spouse. You have to be okay with your spouse being exposed to every part of you and that's both good and bad and having access to the more inner parts of you, and that's a very scary thing. You and that's a very scary thing when you think of relationships is that you have God right, who has access to every part of you. There's no part of you, so your innermost, deepest secrets, your greatest fears, your greatest concerns, the nasty parts of you that needs to change. You have to allow him to have access to every part of that. This is we go through the process of the wilderness experience and being transformed. One of the challenges in relationships and marriages is that we aren't exposed. We want you to see the good parts of us. Many and they talk about this.

Walter:

The issue is that you show up with the representative of yourself, and that's not going to work because we talk about it all the time.

Shanea:

When I show up to a marriage, I show up to die yeah you show up to be like christ I take on the identity of christ.

Walter:

You take on the identity of christ. You take on the mind of christ. I take on the mind of christ but my role is the church. Yes, yet the thing is that when you think about christ, christ said and we read that scripture before he said when the enemy comes, he will find nothing in me. This is why it's important that you be at a place of unashamedness unashamed.

Shanea:

When you're not full of sin, which that is what he's is what it's saying. He was he, he had no sin. He was not full of sin, and I know that we're not perfect they could find no sin in him.

Walter:

I know that we're not perfect, but it's essentially saying that there's nothing that you're holding on to. Going back and I'm going to say it like a broken record William McDowell there's nothing. He said, withholding nothing. William McDowell said that there's nothing I can hold on to you. Right. Like there's nothing I can hold on to. If I want to experience true intimacy with God, I have to let go of it all.

Shanea:

Yeah, I have to be completely honest and open about everything.

Walter:

Exactly, and if I want to experience intimacy within my marriage, within my relationship, I have to let go of everything.

Shanea:

Yeah, because the enemy when he comes, he will look and he will see if he can find anything in you that he can use against you Exactly, which is the things that you've done, probably in your past that you are ashamed of, or people who hurt you in the past that you haven't forgiven, and so you still have wounds, and so he's gonna come and he's gonna poke he's gonna poke and he's gonna poke and you're gonna bleed, and when you start bleeding, you bleed on other people.

Walter:

Yeah yeah, and I think, um, I want to let me see, because I don't think we touched on this before and it did um, I looked and it did not show the revelation that I had on here.

Shanea:

It kind of reverted it, so it sounds weird.

Walter:

Let's see.

Shanea:

What you looking for.

Walter:

Because I like the way that was worded.

Shanea:

Yeah.

Walter:

And I have it here. I was going to send it to you. Okay, yeah, because it, yes, yeah, it completely reworded what I said continue because we're going to go back and we're going to touch more on yeah, I'll keep that for when we go back we're going to touch more. I don't think we touched on this enough and I'm looking to see, because we had a whole discussion about it. So let's, uh, let me see, let's say this, let's say this, uh, the impact of past wounds which is what we was just talking about.

Walter:

Yeah, part of the reason which I just said part of the reason it's hard to stand before god naked and unashamed because, of previous experiences and that's what we were talking about with our fathers, our mothers or lack thereof, or even sometimes just our parents in general, grandparents, or the fact that we struggle with rejection, or we've exposed ourselves to others and ended up being forced to face disappointment. Right. So we talked about bleeding on other people. Because you have these wounds, your soul is wounded. In many cases, your spirit is wounded.

Shanea:

Yes, your spirit's wounded, your soul's wounded.

Walter:

All these cuts, all these cuts, all these bruises. Yeah, all these cuts, all these bruises. So when you are dealing with all of that, you're thinking how can I go before God when you are ashamed? Yeah.

Shanea:

You're broken, you're hurt or you're hurt and you don't trust anyone, because everyone in your life who were close to you were the ones who hurt you or allowed you to get hurt, and so it's hard.

Shanea:

I know for me it was hard to form a relationship with God after my conversion. It's something that I really, really wanted, but I couldn't fully expose myself because I still had a ton of shame and a ton of hurt from a lot of people who were really close to me, including my own father. He like completely abandoned us when we were kids, and so I didn't have a relationship with my dad, and so for those who didn't really have a relationship with their father, it's hard to have a relationship with the father If you don't really know what that relationship is supposed to look like, and even if you did have a father, if you don't really know what that relationship is supposed to look like, yeah, and even if you did have a father you didn't have, if you didn't have a good relationship with him, it's hard to kind of open up and trust, um, someone with those inner parts of you who hurt you in the first place it can become challenging, and I mean, I think that's a story for many people.

Walter:

The story for many people is that they did not have a father, and so they looked at the father as like I don't want to have anything to do with him, I don't know. I grew up in a church and so, for whatever reason, I never looked at God as the problem.

Walter:

Like you know, I knew it was a difference between God and my father, but of course, like I told you, I didn't even I didn't find out. My father passed away when I was nine months, until I was 11. And so this man that was raising me, I thought he was my father and I just thought that he hated me which is why he treated me the way he treated me.

Walter:

But you know, I would pray and I mean I remember God speaking to me as early as 15 when I was asking him why I went through this stuff. I went through and really just kind of providing revelation and so for me, it never really, I just never understood how big God was. That was my issue. I never understood how big he was, even though I had experiences. I didn't understand the supernatural experiences that I had growing up. I was scared. Yeah.

Walter:

You know we talk about levitating and all of these different things like that which we won't get into. But you can imagine a child every morning looking at everybody in the building, your spirit traveling. Yes, and you don't know what it is? Yeah, and so my relationship with God was different. I think it was just I didn't understand how real he was, but we dig into this.

Shanea:

Because you just read about him in the Bible. No one actually really even has a real relationship with God.

Walter:

Which digs back into intimacy, having an intimate relationship with God, truly experiencing him, which once again requires giving over all of you.

Shanea:

Treating him like he is an actual, real person, which he is he's a live living God.

Walter:

He's your father. Yes, he's your father, but, like you said, when you have a tainted relationship with your father, it could shift how you view God, the father, because you are viewing him through a lens of hurt and disappointment and rejection. So yeah, and this goes into the next part, the effect of sin Sin in general. It creates shame and causes you to run and hide from God or the person you sinned against. We talked about that. That's what sin does.

Shanea:

Yeah, well, I mean, sin leads you to death. It doesn't lead you closer to God.

Walter:

And it's just. There's a shame that comes upon it, because God does hate sin. Yet at the same time you get so caught up in the sin that you forget that you can repent and turn away.

Walter:

That's why the Bible says that David was a man after god's own heart. One of the things that we would consistently see with david is, when he did wrong, he would always turn to god and say god, forgive me. Once he recognized it, he would humble himself and go before god and say god, I'm Help me, but we're not really taught that Like as children.

Shanea:

when we do stuff wrong, even when we apologize, it's still. We don't get met with the same type of love.

Walter:

Well, we have to be really careful too, right, because, like I tell a baby girl, true repentance is turning away. So, even as adults, and even as kids we apologize, but we go back and do the same thing. When I think of David, I think of like, okay, he did wrong and he don't do it again, right. So, true, repentance causes you to turn away from what you was doing, but there has to be a revelation that what you did was wrong right and that you truly want to change.

Walter:

Yes, so because of that sin, it leads to negatively impacting your level of intimacy with god and um. So we talked about that. You want to talk about that? The second point on that. What baby. Sin consequences the self-inflicted wounds.

Shanea:

Oh yeah, so it's all over the place. It is. But um so, uh, we see, like in the garden, how sin creates shame and you run and hide from God, because that's what Adam and Eve did when the enemy came to them and produce some type of doubt and cause them to sin. It naturally produces an amount of shame and then you hide from God it naturally produces an amount of shame.

Shanea:

And then you hide from God and then you don't even repent, you just start blaming other people, like when the Lord came to Adam and was like what'd you do? Why'd you do this? And he's like look, this woman you gave me yeah, she made me do it. She made me do it, she made me do it, you start believing do it.

Walter:

She made me do it. You start bleeding on other people.

Shanea:

Yes.

Walter:

And we do this a lot.

Shanea:

Yeah.

Walter:

We do this a lot. We bleed on other people a lot.

Shanea:

Yeah Well, this part where it says sinning against yourself causes you to create self-inflicted wounds, which in return, leads to your your bleeding out on other people.

Walter:

So why did you? What was the significance of why that? Why did that stand out to you when you were?

Shanea:

So when I was reading Proverbs Proverbs, I believe it's just five through seven just talks about all sexual immorality just in general. And so when you have sex outside of God's original design, that's sexual immorality. Right, and the worst sin that you can commit is a sexual immorality because, you're committing sin against yourself, which means you're self-inflicting. You're creating self-inflicting wounds in your own spirit, not by other people, but by you, because you are sinning against yourself.

Walter:

Internally, you're self-inflicting your own wounds. That digs into when you're having sex, yes, when you're having sex. Adultery.

Shanea:

When you're looking at adult films and when you're engaging in self-gratification.

Walter:

It's all self-inflicted.

Shanea:

Yeah. It's all things that when you're sitting with yourself, you're harming yourself. It's negative Because your body is a temple of the lord yeah and so you're in your neck, you're introducing stuff into you on purpose, you're stabbing yourself on purpose, thinking that you're this is, it's all, it's nothing but pleasure. But it's not. It's not pleasure no it's pain, it's pain.

Shanea:

And then now you have to, you have to um deal with the shame and the guilt that you inflicted on your own self. And then, a lot of times you do, you sit there and you're like dang, I shouldn't have did that yeah I feel really bad. I feel dirty. I feel I shouldn't have done that. I don't know why I did it.

Walter:

It's really going back into the importance of just understanding what you do and how it negatively impact you, and so we went through. I'm looking now, let's see Looking. Go ahead, baby, oh was that Proverbs 32, 36?

Shanea:

No, no, it's not 32, 36.

Walter:

That's messed up oh our notes are all messed up on here, but we're gonna keep going yeah they completely destroyed our notes completely, but it's cool, we're gonna keep going, because I was trying to find that scripture that I that I was talking about.

Shanea:

Yeah, dang, you'll have to go back to the original notes but even there I put 32 36 because it was.

Shanea:

It was so much that was going on when we was taking down the notes and I had just woke up and I don't even know why my bible was on proverbs, because the night before I was reading um, um ephesians and I don't even know why I was on Proverbs. And I just started reading Proverbs. I was like, hey, wake up. You need to work on this podcast episode, so let me put Proverbs in front of you.

Walter:

What Proverbs that scripture that you was using specifically? What was? Because I know we touched on one. What was it specifically saying? Because I can find it from there I, I don't remember this is what happened. Y'all, god gives revelation and it's so much be hidden. We try to take notes and then we try to get it set up correctly and it just I really honestly, babe, I really don't, I really don't remember it was was talking about sex.

Shanea:

Oh, I think it's definitely between Proverbs 5 and Proverbs 7.

Walter:

So I think I want to find this to give it to him.

Shanea:

I know it's Proverbs 5.

Walter:

I'm looking for it because I think the scripture is so important. You find that I will continue okay and then we'll come back to it. So I think the thing about it is this right here, and we touched on this before you can sin against yourself you can sin against man.

Walter:

Matthews 18 15, and it is an example. You can read that and it touches on the importance of not sinning against or what to do when. When you sin against someone, I want someone to sin against you and that's literally just how you treat people. Matthews 18, 15 states that if another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confess it, you have won that person back. And it kind of further explores what to do if that doesn't work and how literally that person can be cast out because of them sinning against you.

Walter:

So you could sin against others, you could sin against yourself and, of course, you can sin against God, and this all could lead to negatively impacting the level of intimacy that you have with God. But at the same time, when we look at it from a relationship perspective, as far as our marriage goes, if I'm consistently sinning against you, it could start negatively impacting how we, how our intimacy is, kind of how we approach intimacy within our marriage, and people don't realize that While it's not good for you to hold offense, it's also not good for me to offend you or vice versa. And if I've offended you and you're coming to me and telling me I've offended you or vice versa. It's our responsibility to get that right. God is going to hold us accountable. God is going to hold us accountable.

Walter:

So let's look into the physical aspect of intimacy.

Shanea:

Okay, yeah, I can't find the verse and I don't want to.

Walter:

It's fine, we'll come back to it. So the reason this was so important to me is because I believe that so many people, uh, they focus on physical alone. Like when you first meet that person and you hear it on so many occasions, so many different examples oh my gosh, it was so this. They were so that I love the way their body looked. I love this about them it's all physical, it's all physical and it stays physical yeah, and it you can't even get past the physical no, what do you like about her?

Walter:

oh, I like her eyes, I like how beautiful she is. I like her body. What do you like about him? I like this, I like that. It's all physical attributes that you are focusing on. Focusing on. Then you will say, okay, god, god brought us together, so this is good. Many times, this is where we begin experiencing intimacy and this is what we was talking about in our relationships and place a large amount of focus on. We focus on the physical attraction, we focus on touch, we focus on how that person makes us feel, the outward attributes we enjoy about that person. A lot of us never go past that part no, but even your feelings are tainted it's all about you, it's all about what you see.

Walter:

It's all. It's literally a physical thing and we never get past it and many times we're taught that you have leaders that teach us find someone that you are attracted to. Yeah, find someone. You need to know that when you wake up next to them, you like what you see right, but beauty is fleeting proverbs 31 said nothing about beauty other than the fact that it's fleeting.

Walter:

When it described a virtuous woman. Ephesians 5 said nothing about physical attraction when it described how we are to approach marriages and relationships. Matter of fact, 1 Samuel, 16 and 7, you want to read that? If I can get it open. Because this is really important. 1.

Shanea:

Samuel, 16 and 7.

Walter:

Yes.

Shanea:

States. Oh, I think I hit 17.

Walter:

Okay, I got it.

Shanea:

Okay.

Walter:

But the Lord said to Samuel don't judge by his appearance or height, For I have rejected him. The Lord does not see things. The way you see them.

Walter:

Ladies, I'm sorry you can't be judging a man because he's six feet. Sorry, god was talking about David. Why you laugh. It wasn't funny, god was. I thought it was funny. You laughed just now. God was talking about David. The reason he was having this conversation is because Samuel saw one of David brothers and he was like surely he's King? God was like nope, nope, nope, nope and he was telling us he was correcting Samuel. But it's a moment for us to look at and say when God is in something, god is always looking at what is within first.

Shanea:

Yeah, so humans always look at the outward appearance, they always look at the physical attributes. They don't look at what's inside a person. But they can't because they don't. They're not taught to. We're supposed to take on the mind of Christ.

Walter:

We're born into a world of sin. Exactly so. It's just what it is. Yes and so when you look at this right, what it shows us is that intimacy and god design relationships begin within. You're drawn to that person because of what lies beneath the layer of skin absolutely so, like even when god brought ease to adam.

Shanea:

I don't recognize her, not because of how she looked, but he recognized what was in her yeah who she was on the inside and he spoke that yes and he called her by that, he called that out.

Walter:

And so even when we think about and we have to be really careful because we'll be quick to say this is a god-ordained marriage or this is a god-ordained relationship, but when you dig into or you explore the story or the origin of that relationship, the origin of that relationship, you begin to realize that, bruh, that relationship was based upon lust, that relationship started out based upon lust. You saw him, she saw you. Physically, it just flared and you just.

Shanea:

But people don't know what lust is.

Walter:

Okay. So what would you say? Lust is, Am I putting you on the spot?

Shanea:

A little bit, a little bit. So lust is anything that you kind of desire with your eyes, right.

Walter:

We looked at the definition of lust.

Shanea:

Or gets your attention. We did look it up, it's just not on here.

Walter:

So lust is an intense or passionate desire, often referring specifically to strong sexual desires. It can also be used to broadly describe a powerful craving for something such as power, money or success. Describe a powerful craving for something such as power, money or success. So you have physical or physiological or not, I'm sorry. Psychological, god help me. Emotional which? Or emotional which is a strong physical or emotional craving, particularly for sexual gratification. So lust is all about. When you think of lust, it's about self-gratification.

Shanea:

Right. But then people are like, okay, well, I'm not lusting after this person but, they are attractive. And so then we looked at what the definition of attraction is right, and it says the action or power of evoking interest, pleasure or liking for someone or something. Power of evoking interest pleasure or liking for someone or something. That's lust. It's because I should not be looking at you at all and having a thought about your outward appearance.

Walter:

So here's the danger, people what we don't realize, and that thunder is hitting. What we don't realize is that I could lust after my wife and my wife can lust after me, and that's not of God, even though we are in a God-ordained marriage where God has brought us together. He is the center of this marriage. Lust can still take the forefront of this marriage, where I am looking at her and I'm lusting after her and I am approaching her from a physical perspective, as well as her doing the same with me. It's still wrong, it's still going to be dangerous, because it can open a door for other things, which is why we have to always check our level of intimacy. Why am I intimate, like? What is what's drawing me to you? What am I connecting myself to?

Shanea:

Right Like why am I attracted to you? Why do I find you beautiful? Why do I find this woman beautiful? Why do I find this man handsome? Why do I find it?

Walter:

There's nothing wrong with you saying that your wife is beautiful. There's nothing wrong with you saying that your husband is handsome. But why? But why? What is it? And it's fine if you're like, okay, she's a beautiful person. Yeah, we talked about this before. I would always tell you it's not that you're not beautiful, you are beautiful. But it's something deeper within that has my attention to where I'm not driven from set by saying like, oh my gosh, I just want to be physical with her. It's more so, like I want to get to know her more and I want to spend time with her and I want to gain an understanding of what's with inside you and that's what God has called it to be.

Shanea:

Yeah, and I think the thing is and I know we talked about this in the last episode and people got mad because they're like you can look at people and not lust after them. And it's like what's your definition of lust? Because if I'm with you and you see another woman and you're like she's beautiful, there's something in you that's attracting you to her beauty. What is it in you that is attracting you to her, to her outward appearance?

Walter:

which is what you have to give to god and people don't believe.

Shanea:

They don't like to die to self they don't want to hear you have to die to self it's possible we're human right. We live in a world full of sin, and so there are things that we have to do, we have to put in place.

Walter:

And I would say once again, men, it is possible for you to be in a situation where you see women and you don't see nothing but your sister or your brother. Matter of fact, if you see a woman that's half naked or whatever the case may be, like bro, I don't even want to see it, I'm turning away. No, I don't want to even see it.

Shanea:

Exactly.

Walter:

I'm like why are you out here like that? It's not like, oh my gosh, I got to look, I got to look. If that is the case, you really need to take that to God because, that is unhealthy.

Walter:

It's not healthy, it's not good to be in a situation. We hear so many people talk about so many things and it's like, bro, y'all in bondage, you struggled with same-sex attraction and homosexuality and you think that for the rest of your life that you're just supposed to struggle with being attracted to men as a man, or you're supposed to struggle with being attracted to women as a woman, and it's like, no, you're not. What that is telling me is that you aren't fully free.

Shanea:

Yeah, or attraction to the opposite sex.

Walter:

That too, you're not fully free, no, and my heart goes out to you because it's like you can be free.

Shanea:

You could be free yeah, you just have to die to self and you gotta stop doing it. You can't be scrolling on instagram and like, oh, I see all these baddies. No, you shouldn't be. If you see all these baddies, you don't need to be. You don't need to be on change out your feed.

Walter:

Change your feed. Change out your feed yes, and there's some things that you can't avoid.

Shanea:

You can't stop other people from dressing the way that they want to dress, or you know like you can't stop it, but what you can do is stop yourself from looking yes, so let's, let's go on before we get caught up okay so in god-ordained relationships and I saw someone had a comment about this.

Walter:

We talked about this True intimacy from within the context of marriage. Always got to say that will lead to intimacy within private moments. Whereas you partake, you grow even closer together. There is a desire to draw near to that individual that is not driven by lust, but a pureness.

Shanea:

Right, that's because of the God in them. And some people will say, well, it's a God-ordained marriage because I'm a Christian, he's a Christian. But we have to look at the beginning right, where you had Adam, who spent time with God, whose spirit joined with his spirit. I don't know what scripture that is, I know I have it. But when your spirit is joined to God's spirit, you become one.

Walter:

It's.

Shanea:

Ephesians right or Galatians.

Walter:

That is, give me a second.

Shanea:

Paul spoke on it right, Because we were talking about this, but anyway. So Adam's spirit was joined to God's spirit. Eve's spirit was joined to God's spirit.

Walter:

You're talking about 1 Corinthians 6 and 17.

Shanea:

Yeah.

Walter:

Chapter 6, verse 17.

Shanea:

What does it say, babe?

Walter:

That says, give me one second, Chapter 6, 17. It says that but the person who was joined to the Lord is one spirit with him.

Shanea:

So they were each joined to the Lord. So, yes, you as a Christian and you as a Christian, and then coming together and then saying that it's a God-ordained marriage is not what that is. Sorry, eve brought or God brought Eve to Adam.

Walter:

God told Adam that it was. God said it was not good for man to be alone. Adam wasn't even looking.

Shanea:

He created Eve for Adam.

Walter:

Specifically, specifically. God didn't create Eve, sarah, whomever else five, six, seven different women and brought all five, six, seven women to Adam and said you choose. Or God didn't create Eve, sarah, elisa, rebecca, and said Adam, you can be with every last one of them. No, he didn't. Or vice versa. For Eve, god created. Eve for Adam God created. Eve for.

Walter:

Adam from Adam's rib, meaning that there was a part of Adam that was taken out and placed into Eve, which is why the Bible says that the two become one flesh. The two become one because God is bringing Eve back to Adam and there's a part of Adam that was in Eve.

Shanea:

Well, and one meaning a complete 360 wholeness a wholeness in all aspects, right. So Adam being whole being joined with the Holy Spirit is one. Eve being whole joined with the Holy Spirit is one. Them coming together is one. Because you have this Holy Spirit, you have God's Spirit, god's Spirit, you have God. Now you have a Trinity, right, and so it's just like when you have a drop of water plus a drop of water, it's still one drop of water when you mix those drop of water and you add another drop of water and that's still just one big drop of water.

Shanea:

But when you start mixing stuff in that's not supposed to be, that's when you start getting caught up in the stuff right, because adam was missing a part of himself, which is another part of being whole being whole when he was joined to eve, making them one also and this is only I know, it's a lot everyone but this is something that you have to really ask God to really give you wisdom on, to understand.

Walter:

You can only understand this by the Spirit. It's only understood by the Spirit. So, moving on, sex is a physical act that may or may not involve emotional connection, while intimacy is about deep closeness, vulnerability and trust. True intimacy goes beyond the physical and involves emotional, spiritual or intellectual bonding that builds lasting connections. So we talked about this there's sex, there's intimacy.

Walter:

right, you can have sex without being intimate correct but we misconstrue sex for intimacy exactly, exactly there's a lot of people having sex, but they're not intimate because it's a closeness, but it's like a fake closeness.

Shanea:

Yes, it's just close proximity with your physical bodies.

Walter:

And you dug into this. Right, we talked about this. You want to read point five, because that digs into what happens when you're having sex without God.

Shanea:

Yeah, so like if you're having sex with someone who God did not ordain for you to be with, you're strengthening, or you're strengthening and creating ungodly ties, but when you're with the person God has ordained and called for you to be with, you're strengthening and creating godly ties. So we have soul ties, right, but you could have a godly soul tie or you could have an ungodly soul tie and what happens in those instances.

Walter:

If it's something that is outside of god, you start literally having a stronger yearning from a physical perspective right I gotta have sex with you. I have to do this. I, oh my gosh, like I'm just drawn to you. Oh, she's like. Now I'm starting to lust after you.

Shanea:

I need you every second of the day, and it's, it's just, we gotta be, and it's it's crazy because when you're with someone you're not supposed to be with and you're having sex with them and you're, they're not treating you right, but you can't. You can't get out of the relationship, because every time you're having sex, you're strengthening a cord, you're strengthening a tie, and so you keep strengthening that tie. Of course it's going to be hard to break away and you're like dang, I don't even know why I'm staying in this relationship. Because you keep having sex, you keep strengthening a bond, you keep strengthening a tie that you can't see, and so that's why, in the natural, you're like I know I don't need to be in this relationship.

Shanea:

This is a horrible relationship but I don't know how to get out.

Walter:

Until you were able to get away, and now you stopped the whole physical, because that was the only thing that was even connecting you.

Shanea:

Yeah.

Walter:

Was the physical.

Shanea:

Yeah. So, but then, when you break away from that person, you're still like I don't know why. I still feel like I'm connected to this person. You have to break those ties and it's hard because there's nothing too hard for God, obviously, but there's a lot of work that you have to do because of how many times y'all had sex or how long y'all been together. It just is what it is. It's easier to break those ties from people when you don't have sex.

Shanea:

It's easier for you to see because we see, in last time when we talk, uh, in the last episode with samson and delilah, um, he was blinded because of her, yeah, laying with her being blinded by lust.

Walter:

Broke that covenant off that he had with God and it literally negatively impacted everything. And so let's dig into this next. We talked about this what babe. Intimacy is the act of becoming one. We're looking at oneness in god and you remember we was talking about this. Intimacy is the act of becoming one, and it acts as a bridge between the two and god we talked about that.

Walter:

Um, what? That's one of the things that god was really, uh, placing in my spirit the importance of intimacy with God, the importance of intimacy with your partner, intimacy from how God designed intimacy to be. It's that bridge that connects the two. It's that bridge that connects you to the Father. It's that bridge that connects you to Christ. Even when we think about the relationship with Christ and the disciples, where they went from being Christ's servants to being Christ's friend, within that three-year period of doing life together, is there was a level of intimacy that was there, from walking together, from doing life together, from them being obedient to.

Walter:

Jesus from them, being open to what he had to say and listening and submitting themselves, because Jesus told them you have to literally let go of everything and follow me. Here it goes once again, withholding nothing.

Shanea:

Withholding nothing, literally, and that's a great example, because every time I think about my journey with God, with following Christ, you have to. I had to let go of everything and I had to be okay with it. Even other people are going to be mad, but I had to let go of everything Everything I used to know, everything I used to do, everything I used to say, how I used to dress, how I used to talk.

Walter:

Because you realize all of it it's not God, it's not what God wanted us to be, it's not what God wanted us to be. It's not what God wanted me to be, and it was a struggle to let go of friends who were family, who I loved dearly. Yet I had to understand that this is a life that I created outside of God. I did that.

Shanea:

That was me. I created these friendships. It was centered based upon the world culture that is driven by the enemy yeah, and even the way you created relationships with your own family members were not good. Like like I said, you you keep strengthening these cords, you keep strengthening these bonds, not just through sex, but just being in certain places with certain people. You create ties just being, with being with people you know yeah, yeah, and so I'm trying to.

Walter:

Okay, I'm looking at time as my wife is speaking. I think this is really good that we need to get through yeah the enemy's counterfeit, and this is digging back into our episode of counterfeit yeah so we touched on this right. The enemy seeks to mimic or and we really need you to hear this when we say this and some people may not like it- yeah, let me say that disclaimer.

Walter:

This may this may be uncomfortable, but this is a reality. Okay, and it's everything that we touched on. Here's what happened with this. My wife came up with the. Well, we're just gonna go with it. Okay, the enemy seeks to mimic or distort God's design with a version that appears intimate but lacks spiritual unity or divine covering. This is the enemy's version of marriage. So the characteristics of a counterfeit marriage or a marriage that has been designed by the enemy is flesh first rather than spirit first. If it's focused on attraction, emotion or pleasure instead of alignment with god's spirit, you won't get that next point, babe okay, yeah, I had, because I I did not like that you didn't like, I didn't like this part, so I put the original back in Okay, go ahead then it's okay.

Walter:

Well, I have it here too. So here's what I say the enemy seeks to mimic or distort God's design with the version that appears intimate but lacks spiritual unity or divine covering. His version is flesh first rather than the spirit first.

Shanea:

Focused on attraction, emotion or pleasure instead of alignment with God's spirit. Go ahead, babe. No, I was just here when I had the enemy's desire for intimacy is a distortion of God's original design for intimacy, and we know that he twists everything and distorts everything God intended for good and makes it evil and distorts everything. God intended for good and makes it evil. So just being intimate he will. He use sex as a form of intimacy.

Walter:

Yeah, he does.

Shanea:

You know what I mean.

Walter:

That becomes your intimacy.

Shanea:

Exactly that's all you think of when you think of intimacy is sex.

Walter:

Exactly, and it's transactional Exactly your entire. All you think of when you think of intimacy is sex. Exactly, and it's transactional Exactly. Your entire relationship becomes transactional. Your love becomes transactional instead of covenantal, and so it's based on needs, desires or convenience, not sacrificial love or divine purpose. And instead of having a spiritual alignment, what are you looking at?

Shanea:

oh uh, I didn't know that. I didn't know this part was in here.

Walter:

Yeah, it is okay, see, let me, let me go let me, let me, let me work let me work. And so there's soul ties without spiritual alignment.

Shanea:

It's soul ties um one of the things that God dealt with me on in the early on with you, Right like what I was saying, like you having a tie with somebody, but it's an ungodly tie.

Walter:

Because, well, you're tied to the soul when God has called for our spirits to be connected.

Shanea:

Exactly so. People are always saying soul mates, and we talked about this in a very familiar first episode.

Walter:

We talk about you love you, we talk about you, love you, even love from your soul. And that's one of the things I didn't understand until moving on with this guy was telling me that I'm supposed to love from the spirit. And that digs into Galatians 5. Because when we look at Galatians 5, Galatians 5 says that love is a fruit of the spirit.

Shanea:

Exactly. So how can we love if we don't have the Holy Spirit? Exactly, if we aren't being led by the Holy Spirit? Because it's produced by the fruit of the Spirit, exactly.

Walter:

It's a fruit of the Spirit, exactly, and so, with that being the case, when you love outside of God, it's very soulish, yeah, so it becomes transactional, because the enemy is transactional.

Shanea:

It becomes flesh-based. The enemy is transactional. It becomes flesh based, it becomes love, becomes something that is gratified and recognized through how you're feeling in your flesh and in your body. You don't love me because you don't do this for me. You don't love me because I don't feel this. You don't love me because of this. That's crazy, but it's a great revelation because it's right there. The fruit of the spirit is love. One of the fruits of spirit is love.

Walter:

So with the soul ties and with that being the case is we talk about this as an emotional or sexual bond that fills deep but lead to confusion dependence or even bondage or even bondage.

Walter:

So, when you're dealing with this, this is so important because God's timing Jesus always talked about going with the timing of the father. The enemy always will set you up in a space where it's built outside of God's timing or will, often through manipulation, lust or emotional wounds, and it is void of true oneness with God, making the union vulnerable to division insecurity and spiritual warfare.

Walter:

This, right here, everyone, is the enemy's example of marriage. I am so sorry that you may feel uncomfortable with this, but the enemy has his own version of marriage that he wants you to be a part of.

Shanea:

Exactly, and we just went through it. Sure did.

Walter:

Once again highlights Flesh first rather than spirit first, transactional instead of covenantal, right Soul ties without spiritual alignment. Hallelujah a covenantal right soul ties without spiritual alignment, hallelujah, and it's built off of. It's built outside of god's timing or will, often through manipulation, lust or emotional wounds yeah.

Shanea:

So you're approaching dating or relationships like um, am I attracted to this person, person flesh first. Then what can this person do for me? What do they bring to the table? Transaction, it's transactional. Then you start doing things with each other, creating ties so that even when you want to break away from this person, you can't because you already created a tie, whether you and that's due to dating, being in certain places, in certain spaces with this person, being in close proximity with this person, having sex with this person, kissing this person, touching this person, being in certain different places with this person, you're creating ties and ties to places with this particular person. So, even if you want to get away, you can't. Yeah.

Shanea:

And so then it's like, oh like, oh well, we should just get married and strengthen that tie even more yep, it's the only thing to do, and the result of that is this and I'm all doing this without consulting god when you think about it, let's think about it from this perspective.

Walter:

So while a god-ordained union multiplies oneness in him, the enemy's version multiplies brokenness two people joining without god as their foundation, often leading to spiritual disconnection rather than union yeah so you are literally in a situation where there's a soul tie, but spiritually you are dead yeah, yeah yeah so when you think of the enemy strategy, we're going to end out this and right here, uh, the enemy strategy against intimacy.

Walter:

We know the enemy's desire for intimacy is to distort, the distortion of God's original design for intimacy. God's original design for intimacy within the context of marriage was to create more godly offsprings and to have your marriage and your relationship be a reflection of him.

Shanea:

Yeah, because, when you look at it, you, you guys, are, you're a Trinity with God, you're're one with god, so you can only produce, uh, godly, like beings and this is seen in genesis 3, and you, god, was dealing with you on this right.

Walter:

Uh, genesis 3, you talked about how what god was placing in you was how the enemy introduced doubt on the scene with Adam and Eve, specifically with Eve.

Shanea:

Yeah. So the first thing he'll do is introduce doubt into the relationship or introduce doubt in you to distort what God has already told you about how relationships operate. So now you have the world telling you how relationships should be, how you should approach relationships, but you're not listening to what God has said. It's right there in Genesis he will bring someone to you.

Walter:

But it's like no, he will bring them to you.

Shanea:

The world says I'm supposed to go find you, but the world says no, I got to go out and find. The Bible says a man who finds a wife finds a good thing. But no, you have to be led by the Holy spirit. That's the whole finding part.

Walter:

Yeah. You know, and then you have here it. Really it replaces devotion to God with idolatry.

Shanea:

Yeah, well then, uh, going back real quick just to one, is how, when he did produce the doubt, they send, which opened the door for shame, lust and broken intimacy with God, and so you have this distortion of what relationships are supposed to look like, and now you don't have a great relationship with God, you can't be one with God, because you already opened the door.

Walter:

Which will lead to the idolatry and being open to other gods.

Shanea:

Exactly, exactly.

Walter:

And then you have Romans 1, 24 through 27 for that, and it says so. God abandoned them to do whatever shameful things their hearts desired. As a result, they did vile and degrading things with each other's bodies. They traded the truth about God for a lie.

Walter:

So, they worshiped and served the things God created instead of the creator himself, who is worthy of eternal praise. Amen. That is why God abandoned them to their shameful desires. Even the women turned against the natural way to have sex and instead indulged in sex with each other, and the men, instead of having normal sexual relations with women, burned with lust for each other. Men did shameful things with other men and as a result of this sin, they suffer within themselves the penalty they deserved.

Shanea:

Yeah, so did you read this? The desire is for us to give ourselves to God. Okay, Well, the desire is for us to give all of ourselves to God, withholding nothing right. And the enemy distorts that with this passion that we end up replacing it with idolatry.

Walter:

Romans 24, 1 through 24 and 27. So we?

Shanea:

end up with these lustful desires, these unnatural desires, desires to fulfill our flesh?

Walter:

Or let's dig into it even more you may not be dealing with homosexuality. Or let's dig into it even more you may not be dealing with homosexuality.

Shanea:

You may be dealing with the desires to pull in other things within your marriage toys and looking at movies, adult films and things that you should not be toys.

Walter:

You're lacking intimacy you're lacking god you're lacking oneness, you're lacking wholeness you're lacking something missing and nothing you do will fill it, which is why you keep trying to do this and this. And then people talk about threesomes, and they talk about uh wife's husband swap, yeah, just further perverting everything Perversion, perversion perversion, perversion.

Shanea:

And God's not going to stop you. No, he's not going to stop you. I mean he can if he has a mission for you, but that doesn't leave you void of the consequences. No Of you doing the things that you were doing.

Walter:

No. And then this digs into and you got now is it five? Is it chapter five through seven?

Shanea:

It's chapters five through seven kind of speaks on sexual immorality Sexual immorality and so.

Walter:

This is Proverbs, chapter five through seven, that you all can read when you have time.

Shanea:

Yeah, it's really good because it just paints a picture of how sexual immorality just destroys you. It creates wounds Remember I said I was talking about self-inflicted wounds, because it did just. It destroys your soul and I don't know where that scripture is in Proverbs, but it it literally says it will destroy your soul when you're having sex. Well outside of outside of God's original design. Continue, Cause I remember you talking about it.

Walter:

Hold on, I'll find it Outside of God's original design. Continue, because I remember you talking about it, mm-hmm.

Shanea:

Let's see. So the enemy uses sex to destroy your soul, to inflict wounds upon yourself and create strong ties and strongholds so that the eyes of your soul is like a lamp right, and so you can't look beyond the truth. Because your soul is wounded, so you only see and understand things from a broken place. You're not whole, so you can't even see if this person is for you. You can't see if this word of god is true or not.

Shanea:

Um, because your, your, your eyes are just a reflection of your soul, what you see and your soul is wounded, your soul is broken, so you see stuff from a broken place proverbs 6 and 32, new king james version.

Walter:

It says whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding. He who does so destroys his own soul.

Shanea:

Yeah, you're having sex without understanding, and so you're destroying your soul. And so you have people looking at us on our podcast like we're arguing with each other or we have some type of problem, which I could see, but that's only. You're interpreting things from your soul, because you're broken.

Shanea:

Because you're broken and I don't remember what scripture that was about, how what's in your soul? You're interpreting light for darkness, because darkness is all you know. Because you're broken and I've been there, you know I was there, you were. I was there when we first got together she was when we first got together. I was so broken.

Walter:

I mean, the littlest thing that I would do would be like oh my gosh, you're trying to control me. I'm like. I just say that you can't take a left.

Shanea:

We have no other choice but to take a right and I'm like I'm not gonna do that because you're trying to box me in.

Walter:

I'm like ma'am, I'm just saying you can't take the left, you can only take a right. You're boxing me in how, sway, sway, how? And I didn't understand and I'm like I just, you know, you were at a place of when you were in a situation where you was controlled in a previous relationship. Of course, everything comes out and looks like that and vice versa for me. There were certain things I struggled with because of previous relationships that God had to deal with me on. Yet, understandably, when I went through the process, god focused on me and he. That's when he really and we got to get ready to go. Yeah, that's when he really and we got to get ready to go.

Walter:

But that's when he really started showing me that I was loving Rome. Yeah. Even though I was like, how Like I expect her to love me the way I love her.

Shanea:

But you're loving from your soul. Yeah, it's transactional. Yeah, you're loving from a place where there are things that you expect that should happen.

Walter:

You do for me, as I do for you.

Shanea:

And that's what the world teaches you.

Walter:

And that's not love from God's perspective. No. God's love is. I do for you and that's what he told me he's like. You love her in spite of it's unconditioned. You love her in spite of it's really challenging when you look at it from a man. The Bible says that you have to love your wives as Christ loves the church.

Shanea:

Yeah, like God doesn't love you.

Walter:

Jesus, as the church was mocking him, looked up to the Father and said Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.

Shanea:

God loves you in spite of all your sin. Exactly he frowns upon it.

Walter:

He can't look upon sin, but there's still love to it. He sent his son to die on the cross. Yes, that whosoever believe in him will not perish but have eternal life. Yes, yeah so uh, continue, babe, I'm sorry, no, you're good.

Shanea:

You're good. I think we could, I think we can move on. We could, we could speak about it more, but I know we are a little bit for time and we don't want to make this a hour and a half or two hour long but we have a, you know we you're dealing with sexual morality, yeah, um, and I don't. I don't remember what um scripture that is that talks about how deep this darkness goes that's uh, matthew, I know it's matthew but I'm not sure what um.

Walter:

Go ahead and go through the points, I'll find it.

Shanea:

I believe it's matthew okay, and so, um, now we're talking about, oh, how the enemy will. Okay, and we talked about this earlier, about making ourselves one with god, but culture continues to entice us to become one with prostitutes, creating spiritual ties through casual sex, through adult films, um, through self-gratification, um, that bind people spiritually, emotionally and physically, and it distorts god's original design for intimacy. I think we talked about this in the last episode or the episode before, about how, um, or was this the last episode because we talked about sex? The last episode about how the enemy will just he. He distorts god's original design for intimacy by creating a fake intimacy. So, self-gratification, you're creating fake intimacy with yourself yeah you're creating intimacy with yourself.

Shanea:

You are looking at adult films creating intimacy with yourself. It is a distorted view. There isn't even a person there for you to communicate.

Walter:

There's demons there there's demons there, but you was talking about also not to interrupt you matthew 6 22. It says that your, your eye, is like a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is filled with light, yes, but when your eye is unhealthy, your whole body is filled with light, yes, but when your eye is unhealthy, your whole body is filled with darkness yes and if the light you think you have is actually darkness, how deep that darkness is, and that's talking about your spirit, yeah that's talking about your spirit yeah

Shanea:

your eye being your spirit well, your eyes are to get our gateway to your soul yeah, yeah, not, we're not talking about the third eye people we're talking about.

Shanea:

We're discussing it from a spiritual perspective but even when god is speaking to you, you interpret what he says from your soul. And so he could be saying and God can be giving you a dream about a man or a woman, and you will interpret that as oh, I need to be with this person or something similar, or I need to be in this position, but God's not saying that. But you don't know that because you're interpreting it from a broken place, you're not whole and you're not one completely with God. To understand.

Walter:

At the same time, it's also understanding that your spirit is tainted and congested your spirit is tainted, and that's why you have to be mindful.

Shanea:

Your spirit is tainted and then your soul is tainted yeah, that's why we have to renew our minds in Christ, because, mindful, your spirit is tainted and then your soul is tainted.

Walter:

Yeah, that's why we have to renew our minds and cries because continuously, once your spirit gets to where it needs to be, where it's intertwined with the spirit of god and submitted to god, yes, now you can work on that soul work yeah now you can work on your soul and understand, yeah, and so you just got to be careful, because a lot of people think that their spirit is good. My spirit is healthy. My spirit is good to go nah, bro, you tainted you broken. Yeah, you, you wounded spiritually you're wounded.

Shanea:

Yeah, it's dangerous, you're wounded, but uh, go ahead babe yeah, no, um, I was just saying that how the enemy. He will create, uh, spiritual ties, um through casual sex or um, through a distorted view of what intimacy is, making yourself one with a prostitute Meaning.

Walter:

When I say prostitute, it could be a man or a woman, someone who has sex outside of, or it could be a situationship it could be you dealing with someone who's just very promiscuous, yeah. Who's?

Shanea:

very active. It could be you dealing with someone who's just very promiscuous.

Walter:

Yeah, yeah, who's very active?

Shanea:

But you're making one yourself, one with not God, but with someone else yeah, that you're not supposed to be with, and so we see that through. We see this cultural manifestation through media entertainment that's always consistently promoting lust. Right, they're promoting pleasure over purpose selfishness right um self-gratification, normalizing and glorifying sex yeah, outside of god's design yeah it's all over and so you're just accepting of it because it's there, it's just not. It's just because the majority does. It doesn't make it right.

Walter:

Just because god allows it doesn't mean that's what he wants and that's the thing that we have to understand, and so we have to understand. The enemy's ultimate agenda has always been to what?

Shanea:

Steal, kill and destroy. So he will steal your purity, he will kill your covenant with God, covenant relationships, and he will destroy God's design for marriage. So if you don't think that you can be in a marriage that was orchestrated by Satan, Sadly mistaken. Yeah.

Walter:

It's a lack of wisdom, I'm sorry.

Shanea:

Yeah.

Walter:

And you have to pray on that and ask God to help you. Yeah. It's a lack of wisdom. Yeah, and because?

Shanea:

people want to get married, or I know a lot of women. They idolize marriage and so they think any marriage is God ordained and they idolize marriage.

Walter:

And so they think any marriage is God ordained, and that's not true. No, it's not. Just because someone been together for 30 years or whatever, that doesn't mean that marriage is designed by God. That does not mean that that's marriage goals.

Shanea:

Just because they got married.

Walter:

in general, no, and they stayed married because you don't know what they're going through. Yeah. And so in conclusion, I'm going to read this God's design for intimacy is rooted in openness, trust and a covenantal union when two become one in him first. Let me say that again, where two become one in him first. So, from an individualistic perspective, you become one with God first. Yeah. Then with each other. Yeah. Recognizing and rejecting the enemy's counterfeit centered on lust and self-gratification protects our ability to experience true intimacy, as God intended.

Shanea:

It is very hard for you to experience intimacy in a relationship that was built off lust. Yes, sorry, yes.

Walter:

That's why you get in these relationships and you're missing something. Yes, or you get in these relationships and it never seems like it's enough. You have men that's consistently cheating women as well as consistently cheating. Your eyes are always wondering. You can't even enjoy yourself.

Shanea:

Right or everything that you do is not enough.

Walter:

Yes, you got to have the best body. You have to have the best of this Women. You're so focused he's even focused. Well, you got to be in the gym. You got to look like this. You got to do that. Vice versa, you got to have this Women. You got to have this amount of money he has to have this type of car he has to have this type of house. It's self-gratification on both ends. It's not God yeah.

Shanea:

That's not intimacy. It's something that's going to make me comfortable, make me feel safe.

Walter:

Yes, so we talked about a lot, hopefully, this was a blessing to you.

Shanea:

Hopefully you learned something you got some type of revelation.

Walter:

I'll let you in babe.

Shanea:

Yeah, so, but we appreciate you guys for tuning in. Hopefully you stayed to the end. We thank you, and thank you for supporting us, and hopefully you get to watch the rest of the episodes. They kind of tie into each other.

Walter:

Yes, it build up.

Shanea:

Yeah, well, I mean, that's it. You guys stay blessed. Hit us up in the comments. Let us know your experiences, feelings, thoughts, anything that you've gone through. If this resonates with you, maybe your testimony will be helpful to someone else that sees this video in the comments.

Walter:

so yeah, comment like share it if it's something that's really touching you. Subscribe and subscribe to be a part of the community that God is using us to build. Yeah. So be blessed, and we will see you all on next week's episode. That's it. That's it All right, bye, bye.